Monday, September 11, 2006

I Could Eat a Horse ... But Not Anymore!

Flicka. Mr. Ed. Secretariat. Donald Rumsfeld.

Okay, the first three are famous horses; the last a horse's ass. But I cannot believe that the democrats in the less-educated House of Representatives let me down and voted overwhelmingly to shut down slaughterhouses in the United States (all three of them) that slaughter horses for food. Sure, people ride 'em. Some girls even seem a bit over-attached to them. And I ain't going there.

I'll admit that I have a selfish reason for not wanting to eliminate the slaughter of horses in the United States--horse flesh tastes great! I never pass up a chance to eat horse when I visit my wife's family in Italy--hell, I'm already pissed I can't order it in restaurants here.

Why is Congress wasting time with silly issues like this? If they really cared about livestock, perhaps they'd pass some legislation that made the slaughter of cattle, sheep, and hogs a little more humane, rather than turning a blind eye to what's already going on in America's slaughterhouses.

The vote on this bill was relatively close among the republicans in the House, but the democrats went bonkers for it. Perhaps it was all the movie stars glad-handing House members prior to the vote. While it's nice to see that Willie Nelson and Bo Derek wish to protect their four-footed buddies, I'd just like to note that the American Veterinary Medical Association, the American Association of Equine Practitioners and the American Quarter Horse Association all opposed the bill.

And here's today's nominee for the dumbest thing I've heard a member of Congress utter in the past week. It came from a democrat this time. Referring to horses, and ignoring 150 years of evolutionary biology, South Carolinian democratic Representative John Spratt said "they're as close to human as any animal you can get."

What a dumbass. The taste is completely different.

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